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Straight Talk: 11/20/13 Issue

By   /   November 21, 2013  /   Comments Off

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Emotional affair

 My boyfriend has a friend from work, who is female, that he texts all of the time. It is really concerning me because they just met recently and now he texts her in front of me upwards of 50 times per day. He admitted that he deletes some of their text conversations, claiming that I would overreact for no reason. He claims that nothing is going on, but I am getting more and more wary of this situation. When we are together he is basically ignoring me for his phone, but claims that he isn’t cheating because he is still “spending time with me.” Who is right here?

-Jealous or Justified?

 

Dear Jealous or Justified,

Don’t let your boyfriend spin this any other way- you are JUSTIFIED, plain and simple. Given the volume of messages that they swap, combined with the fact that he admitted to deleting some of the content would lead any rational person to think that something fishy is going on. His conversations with this co-worker are taking him away from spending time with you, which is basically the definition of an emotional affair. It sounds like your instincts are pointing you in the right direction, so continue to follow them. (Have you heard the saying “if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it’s probably a duck….same concept.) Prepare yourself for a breakup, because it looks like that is where you are headed. Best of luck, and keep your head on straight!

 

Clothing conundrum

 My parents don’t like my girlfriend for a variety of reasons, but the main concern is her clothing. My parents are old-school and think that she should dress more conservatively, especially in front of them and at family functions. I would feel really awkward bringing this up to my girl, but want my family to accept her. Given that we will all be together for Thanksgiving, how do I handle this?

-In-the-Middle

 

Dear In-the-Middle,

Though your parent’s issue with your girlfriend’s clothing seems to be a bit petty, it may be worth “fixing” in order to keep the peace. Afterall, it would be a very easy change for her to make if it means a lifetime of happiness, right? If you don’t want to bring this up to her in conversation, and I can’t say I blame you, try a more sneaky way of fixing the problem. Buy her a sweater that your parents would like, or better yet, take her shopping and pick something out together for the holiday. If it comes down to it, explain that your parents appreciate more conservative clothing and it would mean a lot to you if she made an effort. Point out that this is important to you because she is important to you- so important, that you are thinking of your future together. (Remind her that you think she always looks amazing…brownie points.) She will hopefully understand and go with the flow, because this is not worth a fight!

 

Meet the parents

 For the first time ever, I am going to my girldfriend’s Thanksgiving with her family. We have been dating for five months, and this will also be the first time I meet her family. I need to make a great first impression. HELP. What should I bring to the occassion?

-Afraid & Excited

 

Dear Afraid & Excited,

Fear not, Straight Talk to the rescue! We have compiled a small list of hostess gifts that you can bring to impress the most discerning of parents during the holidays. First, assess who will be at Thanksgiving. If your girlfriend’s mother and/or grandmother will be there, bring flowers. They don’t have to be fancy or expensive- Trader Joe’s usually has great bouquets that you can split in two for around $10. Pair this with a small gift for the host/hostess such as: a bottle of wine, a wine  bottle opener, candy or desserts like fudge, chocolates, or peanut brittle, or our favorite:  a holiday ornament for the tree. Don’t go too big or too expensive on any of these items, it’s the thought that counts. Bring your girlfriend with to help you choose something appropriate, because she knows them best!

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  • Published: 8 months ago on November 21, 2013
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  • Last Modified: November 21, 2013 @ 9:56 pm
  • Filed Under: Opinion, Straight Talk

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