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My boyfriend and I just broke up after dating for about six months. We have the same group of friends, and that’s how we got together in the first place. Things ended a bit messy and there were wrongdoings on both sides. Our friends are expecting to have to choose sides, but I don’t want to loose some of these people over this situation. What do I do?
Dear Newly Single,
This situation is never simple, because so many people are involved. If possible, you need to talk to your ex about it and figure out what you both want. Try to get on the same page so that you can send one clear message to your group of friends. Set up new “rules” for social situations that will guide you and your ex in a positive direction. Can you be around each other at gatherings? Would you rather each be invited to certain things? Inevitably, you will have to accept some loss in this situation because some of these friendships will end (out of your control), but your ex will have to face the same challenge. Make sure you stay open and honest with your friends, and make it a point to communicate with them. The more they know, the more supportive and understanding they will be. However, try to avoid “bashing” your ex in front of mutual friends…it will just make them feel uncomfortable. (Save that for your very best friends who you can trust.) Don’t be afraid to be direct and to the point by acknowledging that things will be different now. The best thing you can do is to stay flexible and remember that things will get easier as time passes.
I’m worried that I won’t get a job after graduation. I am doing well in classes and fulfilling all requirements for my degree, but what if that isn’t enough? As a student right now, the prospect of job hunting seems impossible and overwhelming. What can I do to ensure that I will find something?
Dear Uneasy Undergrad,
You definitely are not alone in your unemployment worries. Finding a job out of college has been harder in recent years than any other time in history. Calm your nerves by realizing that there are things you can do to help yourself get ahead. In fact, you’re already ahead because you realize that taking class and fulfilling program requirements may not be enough to give you an edge to actually get the job. You will need a perfect resume and cover letter for future applications to grab hiring managers’ attention. USE YOUR RESOURCES AS A STUDENT-make an appointment with Career Services at COD- they can help you with this! Student Services Center (SSC) Room 3258, (630) 942-2230. A great way to really figure out what employers will be looking for is to look (sounds ridiculously obvious, doesn’t it?)- Google search for job postings that you would love to have upon graduation and look at the requirements as well as the preferred skills that the listing asks for. Make your own list of the things that come up often in these job listings. If you don’t have those skills, now is the time to get them! Make a portfolio of examples of your work, so you have something to show in your interview, and most importantly, do NOT give up!